Well Nanowrimo has come to an end and I did not write a novel in 30 days. I wrote some things, I wrote a lot of things in fact but they did not turn into a novel.
I knew upon commiting to writing a novel in November (Nanowrimo) it was going to be a challenge to sit down and ‘find the time’ to write. I am currently working 3 jobs, interning and finishing off my university for the year so I struggle to find the time and motivation after long days and long hours.
And to be honest, I didn’t know what to write about. I went from one idea to another recklessly abandoning one idea because I thought it was shit and launching into another only to find that that could also be shit.
If Hell for a creative was going to be filled with something it would be distractions and procrastination and a sprinkle of self-doubt. Everytime I sat down to write and couldn’t think of any dialogue or plot in the chapter instead of working my way through it and staring out the window thinking like all other writers in my fantasy I went on the internet, particularly YouTube.
YouTube is the land of distraction, there are cat videos, in-depth gaming roleplays and reviews that I must find out about, especially Sims play throughs. Show me that perfect family! And the endless amounts of ‘how to stop procrastinating’ ‘how to stay motivated’ featuring a pretty white girl in her early twenties who has probably never worked a retail or customer service job and just fell into being an influencer, but as usual I digress.
Amoungst all this choas and excuses of not writing I found that the most important part of creating something is to MAKE time for it each day, whether it be 15 minutes or 2 hours. Writing is not about smashing out a book in a month it’s about forming the habit to actually sit down and place words on paper.
BUT THE INTERNET!! Oh my god it’s the bain of my existance. It is both Heaven and Hell and I hate and love it equally.
Part of me considers investing in a typewriter to physically type out my work and mail it to an editor but as much as I would like aspects of the 19th century to return (particularly the simplisicity of life) I think that is a waste of everyones time when I can simply email through a few chapters instead BUT nevertheless it is something I consider almost daily in order to escapse the blinding blue light of the artifical screen.
Turning the Internet off helps, so does turning my phone off and throwing it out the window, watching it smash on the pavement and then regretting throwing a overpriced $1000 object out the window. I don’t do this obviously but can you believe that phones cost that much now? And we all buy them like it’s the bees knees. What an actual joke.
Moving swiftly forward, I did not write a novel in 30 days but I wrote in my journal consistantly and I worked out some mental bloackages that have been holding me back for quite some time now. I flip back and forth as to what I want to share online, whether I should be personal or professional or a mixture of both, I dabble nonetheless, swinging on the trapeze of both is exhilatrating and frightening.
Anyway, I am writing, I’m intentionally journalling which I will post about #soon. I am writing short stories, songs and poems and little bits quotes on instagram. I’m practicing, I’m getting better but most importantly I’ve started and I’m doing it.
Starting is always the hardest part.