We visited Blarney Castle on the 7th to kiss the Blarney Stone, which gives you the “gift of the gab” or silvertongue. I was reluctant to do it because I don’t think it is a very good trait to have as a person but then I reasoned with myself because I may never be here again and I could use this “gift” as a force of good.
We visited an old church which was also a graveyard with a spectacular view over the hi8ll and had all these ravens.
It was creepy, but very peaceful, everything seemed to be at rest and I got no bad feelings like I usually do at graveyards, this one was different.
I am going horse riding this Saturday in Wicklow where Ps I Love You was filmed, I’m so excited for that, it will be beautiful. There is so much live music here, at every corner and every pub, it inspires me so much as a musician but also intimidates the hell out of me because some of them are so talented.
Fear holds me back from chasing my dreams so much. I have tried every which way to let go of that fear but it overwhelms me so that I end up doing nothing. I need to change that this year.
I need to just pursue what I want,even if I am interested in a thousand different things. I’ll just do all of them. I think I’ll probably study film production at some point, rather then wrestling on whether it’s a stable career choice.
I don’t know if journalism interests me much anymore, I’m more interested in editing, publishing, game and film production then journalism, I’m still interested in writing of course, writing is at the top of my list.
In fact I probably should take Henry’s commandments of “write first and always, music, art, friends, these all come after.”
I think I’ll sign on to do a creative writing course after I finish my animal course with Open Colleges. I’m glad I have time off uni to get my head straight.
I’m excited to start my acting course as well when I get back home, hopefully it will open doors and teach me a lot. I’ve missed acting so much and I should have never let someone talk me out of pursuing that passion.
This trip has given me a lot of time to think and put things into perspective but it has also made me more confused and disappointed in my achievements. I’m 23 years old and this is the best thing I’ve done?
Most people travel when their younger, Jade did this when she was 18 years old. I’ve missed the boat of success and now I feel like I’m drowning in the sea of broken dreams and it fucking hurts.